Amun curled up in the corner of the large bed, blinking around him in terrified incomprehension. Why was he here... and who would punish him? He'd been very very very bad and needed to be punished. A giant floating penis drifted closer and he screamed, pulling the sheets over his head.

Seth entered the room quietly. his... guest... was still sleeping, but he would want to be awake. "Neferkekewi," he said, placing one hand gently on his arm to shake him. Priest Mahaado had used too strong a sleeping spell, perhaps...

Neki was still passed out he didn't even know anyone was there.

Mm... He didn't have any way to wake him up, really. "Bitey," he called, and the dragon came into the room. Seth smiled a little; Bitey was recovering. he didn't actually remember Bitey, but he remembered that Atem would sometimes get annoyed with him, but still, he liked him. "Can you take us to Amun's hospital room, please?" he asked the dragon politely,as though he were a new acquaintance. Bitey made an unhappy noise but wrapped around Seth as he picked the unconscious consort up and in a second teleported them to the hospital room.

Neki still didn't wake at all his body totally limp. Yeah....Mahado had waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay over done the spell

"Amun?" Seth asked, noting the quivering lump under the sheets. "He needs your magic."

Amun peeked out from under the sheets, eyes wide and terrified.

Seth noted the emotions and approached carefully, setting Neki on hte bed. "I won't hurt you," he said. "He has a sleep spell on him that he needs undone."

"Sleep?" Amun blinked. "Neki... you brought me Neki back!" He hugged the other, undoing the sleep spell.

Seth retreated, finding a chair and drawing his legs up into it, being unobtrusive in the corner and watching them.

Then he winced as the movement aggrivated his broken ribs

The instant Amun held him he blinked, his eyes still red and slightly puffy from his tears. He had a hard time focusing them. Then he saw Amun and he smiled and wrapped his arms about him tightly. "Amun...."

"Neki." Amun cuddled close. "Bad... who put the collar on you, Neki? Were you bad?"

He blinked confused then he looked over at Seth. "He put it on me...will you take it off?"

Amun touched the collar, and it came loose in his hand. He stared at it for a long moment, then put it on himself and curled up.

"Amun?" he was still confused. "Why have you put that on yourself?" He reached out to try to remove it.

Seth frowned slightly. "I don't think anyone else knows the spell to take that off..."

"I've been very bad."

"Bad? How?" he moved Amun closer to him and looked at him, brushing his fingers over his face gently.

"I hurt you. Broke you. bad bad... used magic for bad things." He glomped Neki. "Take away bad magic. Then I can be a good boy."

"You've never hurt me, Amun." he held him and closed his eyes.

Neki gave him a sad look. "Took it away... all in the dark."

It hurt... Gods, it hurt. He hadn't thought it would hurt seeing the two of them like this... He wanted them to be happy, just because... he did. but gods it hurt so bad... He hid his face behind his knees. ~Please wake up..~ he begged into his mind, where he had spentthe entire night. ~Please, Atem, I need you...~

He shook his head. "You didn't do anything wrong, Amun." Damn Mahaado for doing this to his Lord..."I...." he held his hands gently he didn't know what to say.

"I wuv you, Neki."

"I love you too, Amun." He held him tightly and started to cry.

There was a stiring in Seth's mind. Somthing...but it wasn't clear.

Amun didn't even know what he'd done, did he? He thought that Neferkekewi was still Atem... it was Atem he had hurt, broken. It was Atem he needed back... He gently eased away his excitement at the stirred, trying to coax it to life, begging unconsciously for him to wake up.

Amun curled into Neki's arms as best he could. "Thank you, High Priest."

Neki frowned a bit and just held him, he was trying to think of something. "Want to play a game of sennet, Amun?" he asked softly. He wanted to do something to get his mind off this.

That glimmer of something in Seth grew a little more but still Atem didn't wake.

~Atem...~ he whispered, keeping an ear on hte conversation. ~Please. Come back to me...~ He ran his thumb over the ring he wore, reciting the inscription in his mind absently.

"You play sennet?" Amun perked

"Uh huh." a smile crept across Neki's face. "Want to play?"

"Please?" He winced back from a penis that got too close

Neki hadn't notice the penises floating about and he narrowed his eyes at it. He had been told about what happened to Amun and it seemed like he was now at that place in his mind once more. with his shadow magic he made all the penii vanish from the room. "I'll protect you, Amun." he whispered and he hugged him once more. Then he summoned the game board. "You know how to play?"

Atem could hear Seth's words but it wasn't that persay that pulled his soul into wakefullness. It was the overall sorrow that he was feeling. In his soul, in Seth, in Neki. It was too much for him to be able to ignore any longer. He soul woke slowly and a very faint spirit form appeared beside Seth..::Sad....isn't it....:: he whispered into Seth's mind.

Amun nodded brightly. "I learned when I was three!"

"And how old are you now, Amun?" he asked softly as he set up the board. He was making idle chatter with the other as he worked.

Seth nodded silently, and reached out to touch Atem, his fingers going through him as he'd known they would. ~It is... all of it. I don't like the thought of hurting Amun's consort - he's too much like me, and that would leave your double alone - but I need you back..~ Just the fact of having a part of him here, though, was a comfort. His sorrow eased slightly at being able to speak with him.

"I was five... I think." He frowned. "Kind of. I remember more."

::So that's what happened after I lost all hope?:: he whispered as he watched Amun and the soul that had usurped his body. Atem didn't know what to think, he wasn't sure where he stood on this matter. He didn't even feel totally whole himself...and his heart and spirit body ached from all that had happened to him....

Neki smiled and tossled Amun's hair. Then he offered him the casting sticks. "Pharaoh's go first."

Amun giggled brightly and tossed the sticks.

The laugh made Neki in turn laugh. And he watched his pharaoh and beloved...with a bit more life to his eyes.

He moved a few times, then passed them back to Neki. "Why did Seth take you away, then bring you back?"

Seth nodded slightly. ~You should have known I would come for you, my lord...~ The title was more than just priest-to-pharaoh - in fact, that was very little of it. Lover, soulmate, master, pharaoh... ~But at least he stopped hurting you when Neferkekewi came about. ...How are you?~

He took the sticks in hand and threw them, getting a number that would permit him to make another move after that. "I...don't know why he brought me back...." he whispered as he took his second move and then handed them back to Amun

"Maybe he's being nice? To make up for mean Mahaado?"

Atem was distracted watching them playing sennet, that and his mind was wandering about.....he didn't hear Seth at all....

Amun glanced at Seth, then flinched and looked away. He was so bad, so so bad.

"I don't know...." he whispered. "I don't want to think about it alright." he smiled and took Amun's hands in his. "Let's ignore them."

"Them?" Amon cocked his head cutely.

"Seth..." he said as he poked Amun playfully with the sticks on his arm.

"Oh." Amun blinked in confusion... why would Seth be a them? Still, he took the sticks and gamely cast them. "Oh poop." He had to go back to the beginning.

"I took him away to keep himsafe, and brought him back because... thisis where he belongs," Seth said from his chair, to hte childish ex-overlord. He was mildly distracted, though, lookingto hisside where Atem was watching them.

Neki chuckled but he couldn't get over the feeling of someone besides Seth watching them. "Sorry..." he grinned a bit more. Amun was sooooo cute like this. It was hard to stay depressed with Amun like this

Atem blinked a little at seth. Had he said something to him...he didn't remember...he frowned and shivered a little as he closed his eyes.

~Atem...~ Seth saidin worry, looking at him more closely. ~...There's something wrong. What is it?~

::It's nothing Seth.::

Amun handed him the sticks back

He took them and smiled a little. He threw....and then found one of his pieces going back to start. "Grrr." he pouted and handed them abck to Amun. "Are you going to be alright, Amun?" he asked softly. "I'll help you...however you need it"

~It's something...~ he murmured, but didn't press it. ~Until you have your body back, stay in mine... Use it whenever you need it...~

Atem's hands balled into fists a little. :I don't feel well, Seth. I think...I'm going to go back and rest...I'm too weak to be here...:: and he wasn't lying either.

~Yes. Please do. It's enough to know you're alive.~

::A half-life....:: he whispered. Though it was even less then a "half-life" He retreated back into Seth's mind and sat there gazing at the wall blankly.

Seth knew what Atem meant, but he could do nothing right now. Just as he instinctively knew Neferkekewi wasn't Atem... he knew that Atem wasn't whole. There was more of him than hte piece inside of him... he couldnt' be whole unti lhe found them all and putthem together. And he would toil tirelessly until Atem was whole once more.

"Have the doctors said you could leave?" Seth asked Amun.

"Nu-uh." He shook his head and coughed slightly. "Broken ribs and punctured lung. I have to stay." He pouted.

Neki frowned a bit. "Do you want me to heal that?" he didn't know if he could or not since he had never really done anything like that before.

Seth wasn't much surprised. The battle with Priest Mahaado had been rough. He closed his eyes and sat there silently, half conscous and half in his mind, holdingAtem tightly to him, arms wrapped around him and saying nothing, only being there.

Atem pushed Seth away in his mind. :: want to be alone....please...."

"Sure." Amun gave him a grateful look. "I can't heal without the bad magic."

"You don't have any bad magic, Amun." he whispered as he looked at him in concern.

::I'm sorry...: Seth retreated from his mind. In his body he nearly cried, but he forced it back and became strong, because his lover needed strength, not a pathetic uke who needed strength he didn't have. He opened his eyes and watched silently.

"Yes, bad magic. Draining life is bad magic." He blinked up at Neki.

"You didn't drain my life." He whispered. He didn't care about any of the horrible things Amun might have done

Atem sighed within Seth's mind and leaned against the wall of the room there. He tried to close his eyes but when he did that he found himself thrown back to being Amun's captive so he just sat there with his eyes opened....a few tears rolling silently down his face....

Seth could feel every ounce of Atem's pain as though it were his own, or better. And yet he was helpless to do anything about it... he hated himself for that helplessness. ::I'm here for you, Atem...:: he murmured. ::As you've always been there for me. Please don't shut me out. Let me help you. Please.:: He waited to see if Neferkekewi would be able to heal the formerly-dark pharaoh.

Atem only shrugged in reply. He wished he had never woken up.

And that hurt even worse, that Atem didn't think he could talk to him... didn't think he could help. ::Is there a way for you to go back to sleep?:: he asked quietly. ::If there is, I'll do it, to keep you safe. Knowing you're safe will be morethan enough.::

"No, I didn't." He met the crimson eyes of his lover. "You don't care that I was bad?"

::I know, Seth...I just want to be alone right now. I'm sorry that I can't help you right now....I know you need me too...:: he was being selfish wanting his solitude at a time like this.

Neki shook his head. "I don't care that you were bad. I love you...no matter what." He almost leaned into to kiss him but he stopped himself after all the midset wasn't that of his beloved. "I'll heal you now, ok?"

"Okay."

:: No, Atem, I'm here to help you. Take whatever you need. If you need to be alone I'll gladly leave you alone. You only need to think about yourself.::

"Close your eyes." Neki smiled a little and placed his finger on Amun's forehead gently and he started to chant.

Atem sighed. ::It's not fair...:: though what he was calling unfair was questionable really.

Amun did as he was told, shivering a little at the touch of the magic

Neki. "It's alright beloved." he whispered as he slipped his shadow magic along the wounds and slowly began to mend them. Of course Neki was really in no condition to be doing anything like this but he didn't care.

::I know it isn't.:: Life in general wasn't fair... it wasn't fair that they had ot feel so bad for Amun and neferkekewi when no one felt as bad for them in turn... it wasn't fair that eiher he or Amun was going to lose their beloved, in sll likelihood... it wasn't fair thatpeoplewho had done such horrible things to them were going to be excused and never punished, because they were really poor misguided people... it wasn't fair that bad thuings turned them into poor misguided people... it wasn'tfair... Life just wasn't fair. But he would right what he could, and help Atem all that he could...

He made a sweet little purring sound and leaned into the touch. It felt soo nice. He was happy.

::I hate life....:: the spirit within commented to his lover.

Neki's placed his palm on Amun's forehead now as he delved deeper into healing the wounds. His pharaoh's body probably feeling warm both inside and out.

Rage rose up. It tried to take over at the sight of Amun and his consort being so happy, atthe happiness they had stolen from him and Atem, but he calmly pushed it back down. It wasn't his place to be angry. ::Please don't say that...:: he said to Atem. ::Please don't hate your life... I'll fix it for you.::

The low purr grew louder as he felt like he was floating in the warmth.

::I'm sorry....:: Atem's emotions were flinting about not making any sense at all...

Neki smiled warmly. He wished he could fix his mind...but that wasn't something he could do at the moment and he wouldn't without Amun's permission anyway. He pulled his hand back and smiled. "better?"

"Much better." Amun glomped him. "Thank you!"

Seth quietly offered him support, forgiveness, strength, anything he needed without him having to ask.

"You're welcome." he glomped him back and cuddled him...and then he went limp in Amun's arms.

Amun squeaked. "Neki? Neki!? Wake up!"

Atem wanted to cling to Seth but he knew he couldn't. He was pharaoh, the one who needed to be strong....then he frowned when he heard Amun and he looked through Seth's eyes.

Neki didn't respond

And with Neki having passed out....there was the return of the floating penises once more.

"He overworked himself," Seth murmured, unfolding from he chair and standing up. "He used all of his strength healing you, I think. He needs to rest. I'm going to get a doctor to see if you're completely healed." He silently enfolded Atem in warmth and support, allowing him ot take what he needed as he went to the door.

Amun whimpered and cowered, holding his fallen lover like a teddy bear. "Please get me out of here... bad bad place..."

Seth looked at him, then noded and fetched a doctor, who popped a pill as he entered the room with him.

Atem was now silent in Seth's mind...his thoughts having wandered about again....probably a precurser to another mood swing or something....or maybe he was sleeping.

The doctor checked Amun over, apparently ignoring Neki, and concluded cheerfully that yeah, he was perfectly fine. He declared him free to go and wandered out, popping another pill, humming as he swatted at the empty air.

Amun whimpered, watching him leave. "I can go?"

Both Atem and Neki were silent

Seth nodded, his attention perfectly divided, half on Atem in his mind. "Would you like to come back with me, or go back to your mansion...?"

"I... want to go home."

"If you mean Egypt, that's not really possible..."

"No... the mansion is home. But..." He shook. "All those people...."

Neki wrapped his arms about him in his passed out condition...

Atem had fallen asleep inside Seth's mind for now.

"Come with me for the moment then," Seth said. "It's only me there... and that's where 'Neki' is going."

"Alright."

Neki made a soft sound as he lay there limp.

Amun stroked Neki's hair

"Mmm." Neki's eyes opened a little and he nuzzled him a little.

"Bitey?" The dragon, who had been curled into a ball under hte bed, slid out and gwowed, glaring at Amun. "Please?" Seth went on, and Bitey glared at him instead, then nudged the three of them closer together and teleported them all into Seth and Atem's explicitly-painted bedroom, with Amun and Neki on the bed, so that they wouldn't have a long trip to hte floor.

Amun blinked as he looked around, blushing brightly

Neki woke up looked around and then covered Amun's eyes.

Seth said nothing abouthte walls, looking atthem wistfully for a moment, then back at Neki, and suppressd a sigh. "Come on..." he said quietly, holding the door for them.

Neki gathered Amun into his arms and carried him out of the room.

Seth led them through the space to a large bedroom, where Neferkekewi had slept earlier. "this is your room," he said to them. "Do with it as you will... I'll have lunch donein an hour or so if you're hungry."

Neki nodded in silence

"Thank you." Amun smiled cutely at him,cuddling into Neki's arms

Neki held him and smiled, cuddling him.

Seth nodded calmly to them, pushing back the rage again. He needed to get rid of that personality or it would hurt someone he didn't want it to. He went back to the kitched to start cooking, pondering where the Rrestof Atem's soul coud be.

Atem remained asleep in Seth's mind, which was probably good since he probably would not welcome Amun and Neki in their house at all.

Amun just curled up with Neki. "Is it okay to live here? I should probably free the people I enspelled..."

He held him close on the bed and closed his eyes. "I'm not sure Amun." he whispered. "I thought you wanted followers and slaves..."

Cooking took part of his mind offthe problems, or at least helped him relax and think better. He let himself zone out over the pot andwatched over Atem in his mind.

"Followers are good. A Pharaoh is supposed to have followers. But slaves..." He shrugged. "I'm so confused. Papa said slaves are good, but Papa was bad... does that make what he said bad?"

Neki blinked, confused. "I don't....know."

Atem suddenly awoke in Seth's mind and his spirit appeared sitting on the counter next to were his lover was cooking. He was staring down at the floor obsorbed in it almost.

"Do you feel any better?" Seth murured as he stirred the pot, looking at his insubstantial lover.

"No."

"You should be resting then... unless... What's wrong?"

"Restless." was his curt reply

He didn't let the abruptness get to him too badly, knowing Atem probably wasn't annoyed withhim, and even if he was, he would just have to fix it. "Do you want to do anything in particular?"

"No."

With a sigh, Amun snuggled closer. He knew what he had done... but the part of him that was not absorbed by power and darkness saw truer than any knew... and he knew that he had somehow changed the soul of the man holding him so close. He was truly no longer Atem. "I love you, Neki. You're still my Neki, no matter what."

"All right," Seth said calmly. "If there's anything I can do to help, let me know..."

He looked at Amun. "Of course I am. I will always be your Neki. I love you." He held him tighter. "I wish I coudl help you more."

"You're a big help." Amun smiled up at him. "You love me even though I'm evil."

"I wish I could eat some of your cooking." Atem smiled a bit...I miss it....I think." He didn't remember everything himself obviously.

"I don't care about you being evil. Everyone should be happy." he whispered as he pressed a kiss to Amun's forehead.

Amun smiled wider and hugged him tight.

Seth looked at Atem and offered him a small smile. "You can takeover my body later, when it's done," he offered. "Then you can have some."

"I don't have the energy to do that, Seth."

Neki held Amun tightly. "How come you can remember everything that happened but your mind is five years old?" that confused him

"I'm sorry... I didn't realize that." He stirred hte pasta around. "I'm trying to figure out where hte rest of your soul is... you should have more strength if I have more of you. Hopefully it's only in two parts... I'll come in there later, when i came and i don't have to worry about anything out here, and I'll stay with you, but summoned food wouldnt' be the same..."

"Part of me is already dead." He informed his lover.

Seth flinched as he heard that, having to pause inwhat he was doing with his head bowed.

"I don't know. I can remember everything...but it's like it's not real. A dream of a nightmare. I know it happened, and I know I did it, but I'm me. Just me. It's very confusing."

Atem was silent.

"It doesn't matter." he whispered. "I'll help you get back to normal. If that's what you want." Neki held him tightly.

"I don't think I have a choice. The dark will come back... it will come for me."

"...It's all right..." Seth concluded after a moment. "I'll help you... Not all of you is dead. You can still come back."

"Do you want me to protect you from it?" Neki asked him as he looked at him intently

Atem was still silent.

Amun blinked up at him, eyes wide. "Can you? I don't like the dark... it scares me."

"I'll do anything for you. I am your consort. I have many jobs after all, don't I?" He whispered as he looked at him

"...Do you want to come back?" Seth looked up at Atem. "Or... do you want to move on...? Either way, I'll help you..."

Atem only sighed.

"Yes." Amun gave him a sunny smile.

It was his duty as consort, and furthermore he wanted to help Atem... very badly. But... He didn't want to have to help his soul move on. Kill him. After another moment-long pause, that had all been pushed to the back. What he wanted didn't matter. "I'll help you," he repeated. "Whatever you want or need from me is yours."

He smiled brightly in return. "I'll protect you, beloved." Neki cuddled him closer. "Want to rest a little while we wait for dinner?"

"Okay. I am sleepy." He cuddled close and closed his eyes.

Atem was staring off once more not paying attention. He felt fractured though that didn't even describe the way he felt. He heaved another sigh and then slipped off the countertop. Of course he couldn't go far and this annoyed him...so he stood there glaring at the floor now.

Neki wrapped protective arms about the other. "Rest well my pharaoh." he brushed his fingers through that soft, spiky hair and closed his eyes, calming by the presense of his love by his side. Though he wasn't sure if he trusted the intentions of Seth or anyone right now...

He knew how Atem hated it when he hovered; he tried not to be too smothering. He just kept an eye on him, figuratively, and moved away to the sink to drain the pasta.

"What are you making anyway?" he asked softly. He didn't have anything better to do really

"Macaroni,"Sethanswered. "I... didn't think it was reallyworht it to make anything harder."

Atem smiled faintly. "Do you still love me." he asked suddenly.

"I'll always love you," Seth swore, turning around to look at him. "It wouldn't mater what you were or who else there was... there's only you for me." He rubbed the ring. "'Two haertsas one, souls intertwined, love eternal'..."

Atem smiled faintly but he didn't do anything more.

Seth reached into his pocket, and showed what was in his hand, lookingdown at it. It was Atem's ring. "I'm keeping this until you have a body to wear it on again..." he said, sliding it onto his bare ring finger.

He nodded.

"Do you know anything that can help me find the rest of you...?" he murmured, hands clanched into loose fists as he ran his thumbs over both rings.

He shook his head. "You should finish dinner... don't want to keep people waiting after all." He vanished from view

Seth swallowed most of his emotions and turned back to the food, finishing it quickly and dishing up three bowls, which he set out. Then he went back and knocked lightly on their door. "Dinner is ready," he said calmly.

Amun stirred from his drowse.

Neki smiled a little. "Hungry?"

"Yes." His tummy growled.

He giggled a little and tickled Amun's stomach

"Eep" Amun giggled. "Tickles...!"

Neki giggled more and kept tickling him

::They're both here?:: Atem said into Seth's mind anger boiling.

Amun squealed and wiggled

He smiled at his lord and then he stopped. "we should go eat. there's no telling when the last time you had some food was...and I'm starving too." He got up and pulled Amun up with him.

"Okay." Amun got to his feet, still a little surprised that he was the same height as his lover. "What's for dinner?"

:: Yes... :: Seth said. :: I had to. I couldn't separate them, and I don't want your body any further from here than it has to be... ::

"Whatever seth made I guess." Of course Neki wasn't sure he should trust the food but at the moment he didn't care. He opened the door. "We're ready."

Atem went back to giving his lover the silent treatment

Amun looked around. "Where is your bathroom, please? I need to wash my hands."

"There are eight of them," Seth said, leading them to hte closest one, sientlybeggingAtem to forgive him. He wasn't doing it to insult him...

Neki smiled a little.

"Thank you." Amun washed his hands and face, drying them before returning to the kitchen and standing politely by his chair.

Neki washing his hands too, after all his pharaoh had. Then he smiled and looked at him...pulling out his chair for him.

"Go ahead and eat..." Seth said quielty, taking his seat, as far from theirs as possible.

"thank you." Amun smiled as he took his seat, then turned to Seth. "Thank you." he repeated before taking his fork and starting to eat the cheesy treat.

Neki pushed him in and then took a seat as close as he could to Amun. "Yes, thank you." he said polietly as he started to eat.

He only nodded slightly, saying nothing, and slowly ate a bit.

Amun ate quickly and neatly, as was expected of a prince. It was easier if he put the later part of his memories aside, except for Neki of course, and just acted his mental age.

Neki was silent as he ate though he did watch Seth a bit but most of his attention was taken with Amun.

Atem had gone back into the further recesses of Seth's mind ignoring all of them.

Seth ignored them nearly as much as Atem was ignoring them all, obviously fairly preoccupied.

"Why are you being nice to us?" Neki asked suddenly looking at Seth as he grabbed Amun's hand and held it.

Amun looked up, surprised.

"Because I can't not," Seth replied, looking up at them.

"You want something don't you?"

"I want my Atem back..." he replied almost inaudibly. "But I don't want anything from you... Youdon't have him."

"He wants Atem's body back." Amun said suddenly. "Right? So you can get your Atem back." He looked down at his food.

"Atem's body?" Neki looked confused.

"I do want Atems body back... But I don't see how that's going ot happen without killing Neferkekewi, which I'm not prepared todo. I'll figure something out."

"You're your own person..." Seth told the consort. "Completely. but you're in my lord's body..."

"But, this is my body...."

Amun pushed his food away, suddenly sick. He sprinted from the room to the bathroom, gagging and throwing up.

"Amun!" Neki ran after him. "Beloved...."

Seth didn't go after, staring down into his unappetizing food, holding his head with one hand.

Amun shook, curled in the corner between the toilet and the wall, weeping uncontrollably.

"Amun..." Neki crawled to where he was, which was something to probably see, and he gathered him into his arms. "Shhh, shhhh."

Amun pulled back, babbling inchoherently and crying.

"Beloved?" he reached a hand out to him.

Seth threw the rest of his food away and stood silently in the kitchen, arms wrapped around his stomach, tryingot keep frm throwing up himself, staring blankly at the floor.

Atem sighed, he couldn't stay angry with Seth... he had to admit that he would've done the same thing. :: Seth...:: he whispered.

"Don't..." Amun wailed. "Bad...bad... I love you so bad..."

~Atem...~ Seth said helplessly.

Neki looked down he didn't know what to do now to make his beloved better. "Amun, please..."

::You need rest yourself.:: he whispered. He could hear Amun and Neki and he frowned.

Seth could also hear them, clearly. His hands clenched, fnigernails digging into his sides. :: I hate them so much...:: he whispered. :: For what they did to you... I just want to let Rage loose and kill them... rip them to shreds and drink their fucking blood... :: He shuddered and suppressed his darkest side again as it threatened to come out.

Amun wiped the tears and stood up, taking his hand and pulling him upright. "Seth... where is your computer?"

"There's one in the living room..." His voice sounded oddly calm, given what he had just said to Atem.

"Amun...." Neki was confused now and he followed him.

::You don't want to kill them.:: he whispered trying to sooth his consort

"Thank you." He towed Neki to the computer, booting it up and bringing up the journals, unlocking what he had hidden from his lover. He owned him the truth. "Those are yours." he whispered, then dropped Neki's hand. "Those are who you were before I changed you."

:: No, :: Seth said. :: Believe me, I do. I won't, though. I can't. What they did to us wasn't fair. But taking their happiness wouldn't make up for it either... If i think about killing on of them,. it make me think of one of us dying... and if that happened, we would both die. ::

Then he walked over to Seth and dropped to his knees. "Punish me... let Rage out and kill me. I'm too disgusting to live.”

Neki looked at the journals but nothing made sense to him. He had no connection to this Atem at all...then he looked over at Amun. "No!" He ran over and wrapped his arms over him covering him with his own body.

Atem was silent for a while as he watched them.::Neither of them deserve to die...::

Amun just hung his head. "Please. I hate... everything. Except Neki. I can't... I'm beyond redemption. Beyond forgiveness... and if you don't kill me now the dark one will come back and I will do it all again. Please..."

"Don't tempt me," he whispered. "You don't know what I'll do to you." :: Oh, gods, Atem, yes they do... You said it yourself. Part of you is dead, because of them... :: He twitched slightly. Rage was burning to get out, and was getting harder to control, suppress.

He shook his head. ::I forfeited that part of myself to escape the pain I was in. While Amun may have been responsible for my condition that lead to that decision -it was a decision I made myself.::

"Amun don't talk like this..." Neki started to cry. "I don't want to be without you. You're everything to me."

"I love you too, Neki."

"Then don't throw your life away like this...please." he begged him.

::It's his fault! If you hadn't done that he would have tortured you to death! It's my fault for putting you in that position!:: "Get out of my sight..." he said, digging into his sides so hard he puncturedhte skin deeply. "Go back ot your room!" Gods, he was goign ot lose it and kill them both,and then himself and Atem...

Amun winced, then meekly got up and did as he was told.

Neki stood up and followed Amun.

::He wouldn't have tortured me to death...:: he mentally whispered. ::I was a coward and nothing more...::

Seth slid down in the corner of hte cabinets and cried, burying his face in his knees, continuing to dig the fingernails into himself to hurt something and keep Rage at bay. :: It's his fault... His and mine, not yours... ::

Amun curled on the bed, eyes lost. "How can you not hate me? I hate me..."

"Because I am yours and no one else's." he whispered as he wrapped his arms about Amun. "I love you no matter what..."

::Seth, stop trying to take all the blame. I was well aware of what I was asking for at that time. I just didn't want to have to live with it anymore. It was easier to let it all go... I wasn't strong enough to deal with the sorrow and pain so I escaped. The blame is all mine.::

Amun cuddled into his arms and cried himself to sleep.

"No, godsdamnit, Atem, it's HIS!" he burst out. "You know it is! Why are you trying to protect him?!"

It crushed Neki's spirit to see his lord like this. He'd protect him no matter what. "Rest, beloved." He held him brushed his fingers through his hair.

::No it's not his fault Seth.: he whispered. He didn't have the energy nor the inclination to argue with his lover about this.

Even in his sleep, Amun clung to his lover.

"How can you say that...? He kidnapped you... tortured you... raped you... broke you... killed you... and you say it's not his fault...? I already said I wouldn't kill him, but please... Admit he did wrong..."

Neki wasn't going to leave his lover's side. Nor was he going to sleep. He wasn't tired anyway after that extended slumber.

Atem didn't know how to explain what he wanted to say. ::I am to blame for it all, Seth.::

:: No, you're not... there is no way... ::

::I deserved it all.:: he said softly part of his weak soul reverting back to the pet.

In his sleep, Amun shifted and whimpered.

Neki brushed back Amun's golden bangs and tried to ease him as best as he could.

"{Papa...papa, I'm not lying please please don't let Uncle hurt me... I'll be good Uncle...}" Amun muttered in his sleep, his native tongue falling from his lips.

Seth's tears were drying as fast as they had come. Obviously... he still wasn't exactly stable. That or he hadn't pain able to repress his emotions properly and now he was getting them under control. ::No, Atem, you didn't...:: It wasn't the desperate cries this time, but the calm and confident, reassuring affirmation. ::Nothing was your fault.:: He stood up and washed his hands at the sink, than stripped off the ruined shirt and began cleaning the blood running down his sides.

Atem was silent. He didnt have the energy to fight anymore. His spirit vanished from the room and his soul locked himself away in seth's mind back into slumber

Seth sadly said nothing, watching the blood run down the drain, and went to his empty bedroom. He couldn't sleep, he knew that... he got up after a few moments and began to wander around, praying for a sign of where the rest of Atem was.

There was no sign of the other part of his soul since he was sleeping once more. The Atem within Seth would need to be awake for any connections to be made.